dungeons & dragons: episode 4.

As the heroes found themselves, the smell of two freshly-made goblin corpses filled their tired lungs in big gulps. Juicy and Archie Goodman fell over supine to take a nap. Timothy, Simon and Lizette pressed on however without the lazy pair of bones weighing them down. They found a door leading into an utterly dark room. Liz scouted the place sneakily, finding with blind hands several doors leading out and rows of bunk beds... and hearing snoring. Coming up with a quick battle plan, the trio settled on bum-rushing the sleeping baboons! Lighting torches, Tim was the first to draw blood, lighting up three goblins with holy fire before they even woke up! Lizette and Simon both acted bravely too, but missed a lot. Three still-alive goblins all got up, two looking for a fight and one looking for the door. Throwing lances of righteous glory, using knives with cruel dexterity and expertly stabbing with longswords, the party dwindled their numbers to all but one. Foaming at the mouth and swinging savagely, the final savage K.O.'d Lizette! Even with Tim wreathing the monster in vengeful circles of fire, the wicked creature remained unscathed until Simon, appearing out of thin air, sniped the savage right in the shoulder! Praying to his goddess, Tim restored Lizette in time for her to knife the goblin in the back! Outmatched and outnumbered 3:1, bleeding profusely, the goblin made a break for it, leading the gang into another new chamber before being stopped by a fatal arrow.

Clapping suddenly rung throughout the chamber. Turning their eyes from the slain creature, our heroes turned to see a blue dragon-man clad in black-scaled armor and armed to the teeth smiling and laughing heartily. "Good show!" he called out, more excited than angry. A dialogue began as several goblins began entering the room, gathering on the benches lining the walls. The dragon-man insisted insistently on a fight; Tim agreed, but the duelist said he wouldn't battle a holyman. When Liz shrugged, Simon agreed to the warrior's strange request.

Beginning the duel, Simon was given first attack and managed to hit hard against the dragon-man's armor, a few scales flying off. Chuckling and showing a toothy grin, the dragon-man dealt a blow back before getting poked again, in the face! Laughing it off, the experienced combatant healed his wounds before returning to slashing and stabbing our champion Simon. Dealing life-threatening blows back to the regenerative lizard, Simon was met with lightning breath to the roaring applause of the goblins! Caught off-balance, the dragon-born knocked the wind and consciousness out of Simon, slamming him to the ground. Over the noise of a standing ovation given by the dragon's goblin comrades, Tim healed Simon back to his feet before shouting at the dragon. "What's your deal?!" Tim said in so many words. "I just love a good fight!" the dragon replied smilingly. Rewarding Simon with a pat on his bruised shoulder and a set of magic-imbued armor and promising to buzz off forever and leave the farm settlement alone, him and his goblins scattered off in every direction from the chamber.

The battle-weary trio looted the stronghold clean and rejoined their less useful allies, heading outside. They saw the dragon delivering a speech in a lot of foreign yips and yelps to the remaining members of his goblin troupe, all gathered together preparing a caravan. The dragon-man turned to see our heroes and approached with another strange request. "My name is Jonathan Jones and I would like to join brave warriors on your adventure! You're much stronger than goblins!" Accepting this weird ally into their ranks, Jonathan yelled some inspirational words to his former goblin crew and appointed his bugbear bud Slaag leader in his absence before heading back through the woods with his new comrade-in-arms to town. With Jonny staying behind at the edge of the forest, the party of five returned to the mayor, offering the black scales fallen off Jonny's armor as proof of their mighty deed. Criminal statuses were removed, rewards were given and a cult promising wealth and power moving into the neighborhood were discussed before the crew went to Simon's farmhouse for sleepies.

But how much sleep would our heroes get? Would they have scary dreams? And if so, would they be Grandma-died scary or spooky-monster scary? Find out next time on DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS WITH ADAM BATES AND FRIENDS!!!

Adam Papes