christmas wish list.

Wishlist: 2016 EDITION; the Barely Edited 2015 Edition, Formerly the Hardly Changed 2014 Edition

I love being snarky. Here we go!!

Cool Guy Stuff to Buy:

Clothes as in a cardigan or two, a parka, shoes just generally, raven suit

E.E.G. machine

Comedian publication, Eckhart Tolle, Chris Ryan, Albert Camus, Richard Rohr literature, books of the dead, mythologies

A bonsai tree

Albums, compact discs, burnt or otherwise from the bands of today, including but not limited to Death Cab for Cutie, Deftones, Neutral Milk Hotel, Vampire Weekend, Washed Out

Seasons of television such as Louie, Drunk History, Broad City, Eagleheart on digital video disc

Terrence Malick, Mike Judge, Harold Ramis, Bobcat Goldthwait, the Duplass Brothers, Joe Swanberg films on blew ray

Lame Practical Gifts (to be avoided):

750-thread count blankets, pillows so soft they've achieved weightlessness, earmuffs, eye-blinders

Pots, pans, metal spatulas, ricer, blender, toaster oven, hilariously vintage cookbooks, spicy spices rack, bowls, tall glass cups

Nifty grocery tote bag, colorful candles, toadstool umbrella, gift cards to fine establishments, doodads, knickknacks, curiosities, antiquities, etc.

You're the best and I love you all the time but mostly when you're giving me things. Good tidings and blessings from our snow dad and father Jack Frost.

Adam Papes